Toking

My mind is indeed a slate,
Best be startin with non of ya faith.
Empty as shit and nothing to pitch.
I got no ideas nor some random geez.


I see a cheap ass paintin infront of me,
An empty hallway beside of me,
I told ya I aint kidding when I strart writin-nothing but drools.

This AC must be crazy,
It be cryin out like a loose car,
Chance to chase but what the fuck is she trippin?

I bet by now you be like lost in trance,
Shit you be crazy if you have not.
I captioned beach pictures with Philosophy,
But by now I should be captionin my rent cheque in.

Dont be stupid because I aint telling none about not seeing thru me.
This shit is a cycle but I aint here for the hustle.
Tussle up to add a lil talent,
Grease up to prep for a lil education,
Should I be adding my comma here now?

My last sentence was a sentence, or was it not.
Who fucking cares when you gotta pay ya own Pretzel Knots.
Dont be preachin about givin you some slack,
Girl u been growing sum hair and shit cant do none.

I be just listenin over some rap songs,
Mad white bitches be talking about resin bongs.
Ya learn to open yar mouth and end up screaming,
That shit be real cos I cant hear none of my thinking.

Shit still be lost in trancelation,
Shit still be a cuss.



Proud Author: Jane Vadassery

Trancelation Hill

Up the hill you can see the land

With colorful flowers and a musical band

They say you can eat honey stars or other brands

You may say it’s just wishful thinking

I’m telling you my eyes are not blinking

The land is a true paradise

All beautiful things can be your vice

You may drink nectar beer thrice

I dare not kid you for I am not full of lies

I am not a fool like how this story goes

On top of the hill they say amber grass grows

Rainbows wave like good old friends

A pot of gold on each ends

I met a shepherd who gave me a funny balloon

It burst inside my mouth as I sit beside the lagoon

A boy came skipping out of the woods

He was wearing stellar clothes and a funny hood

He says “Hold on to my hand as we ride the trancesit bus”

Without delay, we were in full blast

Up and up, I saw pink clouds

Hold on tight and feel the thrill

Before I knew it, we were up the lost Trancelation hill.

The land where colorful flowers and a musical band appear

Mermaids and girls coexist here

Past and future, oh boy! Do not fear.

Under the disco ball, gilded butterflies sparkled and danced 

They pierced my side with a candy cane lance

I woke up and I realized I was just lost, lost in trance.

Rolled Up Dollah

Ya sit down and ask yar friend.

Yah sit down and relax,

Lay yo back and remove ya socks,

Feel the chills from them hardwood
Ya wish you were with yar dude.

Then you start… grindin and rollin,

Then you start inhalin,

Then you start feelin,
O ya,  feel so good.

Then it be hittin like ya personality been abused,

But she be trippin and feelin seduced,

Ya wish youd be drinkin booze.
Yea, ya say ya only blow them smoke,

But ya damn ryt, ya love ta blow em’

But hold on, a min be passin

And ya lay down, fill in some more

Oh baby, just feelin it.

Ya brush you finger tips across ya skin

Yea , do it right like ya beein mistreated

Uhuh, but you like it?

Yea, she gon like it.

Ya rolling a 20 dollar bill,

Ya wipe the table,

Ya be smellin his cologne but damn drop can change that.

Ya dollar is gon get us to space,

We payin a dollar and be treatin that right

We in space yet?

Ya, we drinkin water like we gon evaporate,

We even werin our corporate,

Like 2 random girls gon’ learn to graduate,

Ya right we surely lecturing ya tanayt!

Slick inhale, blast r ass up

The ceilin’ is all there is for bein 23

 Ya lady I be playin

She be trippin like she knows waddup

Mari jane be prasin her hands up

Tellin she be a child of jah

Pushin like you been purchasin

All ya be buyin is nothing but some chasin.

Ya be rollin a dollar and you be feelin a lil taller,

You be so high wishin parachutes weren’t tied

But wid a rolled up dollar,

I think we calling her astronaut Juana.

You Don't Want To Be Alone

My thoughts they rush in silence

Afraid to be alone with herself

This trembling race to be free,

To be excited, and to be loved.

Regrets, revenge, and anxiety

Too much divisions and choices

Confused...

She pauses her finger as she writes her story

Where to end but rather where to start

The middle is the most painful

She seemed not to understand

But she knew there was always more,

More to life, and more to dream.

But she continues to write.

Betrayal was her guillotine.

She never saw her beauty 

People saw her thoughtlessness

And it hurt, its painful, it feels empty.

She worked hard.

She was kept pinned by these demons.

Demons that eat her from the inside

And now her outside decomposes

Rotting in 10 years time

and you call that a life?

What was her fate?

Marriage was not an option

What you want is what she needs.  

If happiness is a choice,

Then please let people know the truth that it isnt real.

Let her know, love her. 

Oh, what she'd pay to be found.

She enjoys the lost time, she knows she will be found

Hoping it wont be too late

Too late to let her know

Too late to convince her

She can never tame those demons to their knees

But she, the maiden of this story will always continue to write.

Is she still coming home?

A Fine New Limerick

A midst the callous shells lies a stellar

Androgynous as so it seems her intention made vulgar

Resembling her exhibition yielded denied gratification

Remembering the tree roots and their laugh's caution

Antoinette said, "I will be serene and I will not diminish his timeless lunar."

Its nice to know

After a few months, I once again decided to write a blog. I've been feeling all sorts of emotions lately and I realized its a post worthy to be blogged.

For the past month, I have changed jobs, from an industrialized unhealthy independent job to a teacher educational-esk gentle to soft background. My life has pretty much shifted and I believe like most young adults in my age, we are all involved in this circular phase of trying to establish a life or what's not so worse but normal, trying to know what they want to do in life.

I have been trying to hold on to this dream that I always had since I was a little girl and I'm glad it has always been what I wanted and I am doing so much to make that dream happen no matter how long its going to take.

Basically, I wanted to write a blog about having the best company of person you could ever have and that is the company of your own self.

These are my most random thoughts alone with none other than my brain. (momentary realizations today)

Its nice... its nice to breathe in that cold thin air or smoke and exhale all the possible thoughts of life.  Its nice to be alone, to stand at the side of that walkway in a mall and feel as if you can be alone but feel so damn right.

Its nice to eat a cup of noodles with strangers in one table. All aiming to finish that bowl to ride the next bus.

Its nice to stand in a line, stare at the floor and then suddenly a pretty face smiles at you for no apparent reason.

Its nice to be alone, to cross the street and to hear other peoples stories. Laughing as if all human beings are bound to be kind.

Its nice to stare at the sky and think about the most random thoughts that make you laugh. Thoughts of people that make you feel loved and thoughts of pain that make you want to breath in some more.

Its nice to watch a video of a friend and the love he lost in a moment of pure happiness. Its nice to know falling in love has infinite promises. Its nice to know that love is a risk.

Its nice to know that even family will fail to support you but only God's love will see you thru (You've got the love by Florence and the machine)

Its nice to know that you can take your time, if its a love at sight or a heavy heart, its nice to know that you have to be a fool to finally realize that happiness is indeed a choice.

Sinta

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